Empty night
by Gammija
Summary: 'I woke up in the middle of the night, because I couldn't sleep. Not after what I did to Danny.' Maddie POV I really really really don't know what to write here, so this'll have to do for now :) (Don't mind the genres: I still don't fully understand what means what with that stuff)


I was lying on my back, staring at the ceiling. 3.13 A.M. That was the time when I last checked. I couldn't sleep, not after what I'd done. I looked to my left. The big silhouette of my husband was slowly moving up and down. Apparently I was the only one awake. But how could I sleep, after what I did to Danny?  
It had started two years ago. Hé had turned on the portal; I realize that now. Shortly after that, his grades plummeted, he was distant, and the most obvious sign, the equipment started acting up around him. It all seems so clear in hindsight. How could I have been so obnoxious? I guess I suspected something was wrong all along. But I didn't want to believe it. I couldn't. It seems only yesterday he was seven, when he came to this room in the middle of the night, scared to death while clenching an old plushy in his hand. 'Mommy, I'm scared,' he whispered. So I pulled him on our bed and sang him a lullaby. When it was done, he had already fallen asleep. I softly carried him to bed.

But that was nine years ago. And over those years, the boy I once knew so well grew so distant. 'Well, that's not actually true,' I corrected myself. That was the accidents doing. **Phantoms **doing. I said I suspected something the whole time, but I only realized what exactly had happened about six months ago. Then and there on the North pole, it all came together. The bad grades, the absence, and of course the fact that they were never seen at the same time: Danny Phantom was using our son, as Jack would say it, as a human meat puppet. I didn't tell Danny this immediately, because I didn't know how bad it was. But I soon realized that this had been going on for a long, long time. Even Jazz had known about it. I think she didn't tell us because she didn't realize Phantom was using Danny. She actually thought he was helping him. Can you believe that?  
Of course, Jack and I tried to separate Phantom from Danny. But we failed him every time. It seemed it was too late. Phantom had taken over Danny's characteristics, and each time we'd try to split them it felt like we only had half our son, while Phantom was inseparably intertwined with the other half.  
Then, Jack suggested what I didn't dare think of until then: cutting the ghost out. It appeared that that was the only solution. But I couldn't do it. Even when I knew I was actually saving him, I couldn't hurt my boy. After all, there was still a part of him that was Danny, and even if there was a small chance he would be conscious during the operation, I still wouldn't be able to take that chance.  
I looked at the clock again. It was now 3.30. I sighed. I had to get these thoughts out of my head somehow. I slowly stood up, careful to not wake up Jack (though it is pretty impossible to wake that man up), and tiptoed downstairs. I leaned against the kitchen sink, contemplating what to do. When I had decided, I grabbed a pen and paper and started writing a letter.

'Dear Danny,

I hope that you realize that I still love you, no matter what. There was just no other option. Despite all I've said and done, I won't forget you. I'll be waiting here at home every day until you return. I'm so sorry, but this was our -and you- last chance.

Danny, tonight I will try to sleep again, and to ignore what I did today.'

I noticed that while I was writing the letter, I had started to cry. A small teardrop had landed on 'forget', smudging out the letters beneath it. I quickly wiped up the salt water and rewrote the word, then started writing the last part.

'I will try not to cry, because I know this was our best shot. But it will be hard. I miss you. I just feel so alone.'

I didn't write a closing. Instead, I reread the letter, whispering the words out loud. I brought the letter to my lips and pressed a soft kiss on it, as if it could somehow reach Danny that way. Then I took the letter with both hands and pressed it together to a small prop. After all, no one may ever try to contact one of the subjects of the GIW.


End file.
